|
Peter Barron Stark
President
Subscribe for Free !
Introducing our
newest book
Here's what our readers
are saying ......
Order Your Copy Today
Visit our website at
www.negotiatingguide.com
for more great resources
on negotiation
Contact us!
Peter Barron Stark
& Associates
11417 W. Bernardo Ct.
San Diego, CA 92127
Phone: 877.727.6468
Phone: 858.451.3601
FAX 858.451.3604
|
What's New In This Issue:
1. Welcome
2. The Importance of Listening
3. Three Pitfalls of Listening
4. Attentive Listening Skills - Part 1
5. Negotiation in
Action- Listening Your Way to Success
|
|
Welcome
The best negotiators are almost always the best
listeners. Why does the correlation exist? Invariably,
the best negotiators observe the communication skills, both verbal
and nonverbal, of their counterparts. They hear and note how
other negotiators make effective use of word choice and sentence
structure. They realize that when they listen carefully to
what their counterpart is saying, they inevitably learn something
new.
In this issue of The Master Negotiator we'll
begin to focus on how to improve your listening skills. And,
we'll follow up next month with some examples on how to practice
these skills.
Read about our new column,
Ask the Negotiator, at the end of this newsletter. I'm
looking forward to receiving your negotiation challenges and helping
you be even more successful in your negotiations.
Remember, almost everything in life is
negotiable.
Peter B. Stark |
The Importance of Listening
Unfortunately, few negotiators know how to be
good listeners, and negotiators who are poor listeners miss numerous
opportunities to learn more about their counterparts’ needs and
goals. Statistics indicate that the untrained listener is likely to
understand and retain only about 50 percent of a conversation. This
relatively poor retention rate drops to an even less impressive 25
percent just forty-eight hours later. This means that an untrained
listener’s recall of particular conversations will usually be
inaccurate and incomplete.
Many communication problems
in negotiations can be attributed to poor listening skills. To be a
good listener, you must attempt to be objective. Try to understand
not just your counterpart’s words, but the intentions behind his
words. Whenever he tells you something, you must ask yourself
questions like “Why did he tell me that? What does he think my
reaction should be? Was he being honest?” and so on.
Experts on listening suggest
that we all make at least one major listening mistake each day. For
negotiators, such mistakes can be costly. It seems obvious, but
studies prove that the most successful negotiators are those who are
able to uncover more of their counterparts’ needs than their less
successful colleagues. Effective listening helps negotiators uncover
their counterparts’ needs and goals, and this information is
essential to creating win-win outcomes.
|
Three Pitfalls of
Listening
Negotiators frequently run into three pitfalls
that can come between them and effective listening.
Click here to read the three pitfalls of listening
|
Attentive Listening Skills (Part 1)
Great listening does not come easily. It is
hard work. There are two major types of listening skills:
attentive and interactive. The following attentive skills will
help you uncover the true messages your counterparts are conveying.
Click here to read the first six attentive listening skills
|
Negotiation
in Action - Listening Your Way to Success
Successful negotiators understand that
when it comes to speaking, less is better. In fact, many
accomplished negotiators are very comfortable with silence and use
it to their advantage. They know that you can’t talk and listen at
the same time, and that effective listening not only builds rapport
with your counterpart, but often results in a quicker, more
favorable outcome.
Recently, we installed new carpet in our office building. We knew we
needed approximately 8000 square feet of commercial grade carpet, and
asked three vendors for bids. We were amazed at the variance in the
proposals. For what we felt was basically the same carpet and
installation, the prices varied by as much as $4500.00. When
questioning the vendors as to the difference in prices, two seemed
clearly inpatient with us and basically had a “take it or leave it
attitude.” One of these two abruptly said, “If you think you can get
this job done for less, just fax us a competitor’s bid. We’ll either
match it or show you why our carpet is superior.”
The third vendor seemed far more interested in us as not just a
facility to carpet, but as a small business. He took the time to
listen to our concerns regarding interruption of work during
installation, projected life of the carpet, and the challenges of
selecting a color that would work well with our existing décor. He
patiently asked questions, listened to our responses and made
suggestions to help us explore our options. He helped us
understand the many variables involved in buying carpet, such as
grades of commercial carpet, the impact of the installation on
workflow, the warranty, the various types of molding, etc.
Ultimately, his patience, ability to ask the right questions and
listen to our responses earned him the job! While he wasn’t the
lowest priced vendor, when considering the total package we
negotiated, we feel we got a great deal and would highly recommend
this vendor!
Ask the
Negotiator - Are you involved in a
negotiation and not sure what strategies or tactics to use?
Next month we are premiering a new column
where you'll have a chance to send in your toughest negotiation
challenge and our team of expert negotiators will outline a specific
plan to ensure your success. Please send your negotiation
challenge to
info@negotiatingguide.com. If your challenge gets
published, we'll send you our special edition Negotiation Mug,
filled with sweet treats.
Forward to a
Friend - If you enjoy this newsletter and would like to
forward to a friend or colleague, please click on the "forward" link at the
bottom of the page.
|
|
