Making your counterpart trust you is key to successful negotiation. The more confidence your counterpart has in your honesty, integrity, and reliability, the easier you will find it to negotiate a win-win outcome. If, for whatever reason, your counterpart considers you untrustworthy, you will find it difficult to obtain even minor concessions. Think about it. If you were interacting with someone you didn’t trust, wouldn’t you proceed very cautiously, and compromise very reluctantly, for fear of being victimized?

Since trust is so vital in every successful negotiation, we'll dedicate the next several issues of The Master Negotiator to this important topic.  Today, we begin with the first five building blocks of trust.  And, we'll tell you how you can deal with an untrustworthy counterpart.

Remember, almost everything in life is negotiable.

Peter B. Stark

1. Demonstrate your competence. Convincing your counterpart that you have both the expertise and the will to support your end of the negotiation builds trust. We are all more comfortable with someone we can look to for honest answers, options, and solutions. For example, when you are buying a computer, you have a higher level of trust in a sales associate who gives knowledgeable answers to your questions.

2. Make sure the nonverbal signals you are sending match the words you are saying. In the last issue of The Master Negotiator we discussed the fact that your counterpart can tell more about your total message by reading and understanding the nonverbal signals you are sending than by just listening to your words. Congruence between your verbal and nonverbal messages helps create trust in the relationship.

3. Maintain a professional appearance. Rightly or wrongly, people do judge a book by its cover. A well-groomed, professional appearance is important. Further enhance your appearance with good posture, a careful choice of words, a clear confident voice, and eye-to-eye contact.

4. Communicate your good intentions. Although no counterpart is likely to tolerate repeated mistakes or failures, most people will give greater leeway to an individual if they know his intentions are good. Emphasize that your counterpart’s needs and goals are important to you and that you will do whatever it takes to create a lifelong win-win relationship.

5. Do what you say you are going to do. In any relationship, you build trust when you keep your promises and honor your commitments. If you tell your counterpart you will discount the price of a product 5 percent, make sure you do so. Each time you fulfill a promise, you let your counterpart know she can rely on you. Your reliability may be the most important factor in a counterpart’s decision to negotiate with you again at a later date. If you do what you say you are going to do—even when the negotiation is over and you may no longer feel like doing it—your counterpart will perceive you as a trusted partner.

Dealing with the Untrustworthy Counterpart

Building trust in a relationship is a fine idea in theory, you may say, but if you trust everyone you negotiate with, won’t some people take advantage of you? Although some individuals do make a living by focusing on short-term goals rather than long-term relationships, these people are in the minority. If you have a choice about negotiating with someone who seems determined to take advantage of you, we encourage you to find someone else to negotiate with. To stay in the relationship just rewards the untrustworthy negotiator.

If you have no choice about negotiating with a counterpart you do not trust, the following five safeguards may prove helpful.

1. Ensure that every deal point is measurable. It is important to spell out terms such as customer satisfaction, preferred bidder, high volume, etc.

2. Ensure that every deal point is time-bound. When will the installation be completed? If the product or service is ordered, when will the product arrive or when will the service be performed?

3. Build penalties for nonperformance into the contract. If the product does not arrive on the date specified, what happens? Is the contract null and void? Will the supplier take five hundred dollars off the price for nonperformance?

4. Build rewards for successful performance into the contract. If everything goes as planned, what happens? Will the buyer provide the seller with a letter of recommendation?

5. Agree on a neutral third party to resolve any disputes. If there is a dispute, rather than suing each other, will the counterparts agree to mediation or arbitration to resolve it?

Remember, the benefits of a relationship built on trust far outweigh any price you may pay on the rare occasion that you may get burned. With trust, you can build lifelong win-win relationships.
 

 Ask the Negotiator

Dear Peter,

I was wondering if you think it is possible to negotiate the price of a home for rent. I am a single woman with two roommates and two cats (no kids) who is looking to rent a home. I have been researching average rental prices for a few months and have seen some homes in the same neighborhood with the same amenities being offered for rent at prices up to $100.00 different. Do you think it is possible to ask them to lower the price, or will they just tell me there are twenty other people that are interested that will pay their original price? I live in an area where a large portion of the population rents because the new home prices are so high. Thank you!

Sincerely yours,

Kelli
 

Dear Kelli:

First, it never hurts to ask the landlord for a lower monthly rent. So, confidently inform the landlord, "I have research on the rental rates of the homes on the market and I like your house a lot. But similar houses are renting for $100.00 less per month. We are great tenants and we have a letter from our last landlord to verify our word. Would you consider lowering the rent by $100.00 per month?” The landlord has a couple possible responses. First, he/she may say "no." I do not negotiate the rent. Second, he might say that he cannot lower the rent $100.00 per month but may be willing to lower it in a future month if you are a great tenant. If the landlord does say "no," here are a few ideas. First, ask the landlord if he would reduce the rent by $100.00 or $50.00 for the first six months. Or, ask for a reduction in rent if you do a two year lease instead of a one year lease. Second, you may be able to "trade off" rent by agreeing to pay for the water bill or doing the landscape maintenance each week. Last, if you roommates are great "do it yourselfers" you might be able to get a reduced rent if you are willing to make the repairs to the landlord’s satisfaction and the landlord will only pay for parts and materials.

I wish you great success in securing you next rental.
 

Sincerely,

Peter
 

Are you involved in a negotiation and not sure what strategies or tactics to use?  Send in your toughest negotiation challenge and our team of expert negotiators will outline a specific plan to ensure your success.  Please send your negotiation challenge to info@negotiatingguide.com.  If your challenge gets published, we'll send you an autographed copy of The Only Negotiating Guide You'll Ever Need, by Peter Stark and Jane Flaherty ($14.95 retail) WOW!!        

To view last month's issue of The Master Negotiator, the premiere on-line newsletter for negotiators, follow this link:

The Master Negotiator, Volume 2, Number 8 Nonverbal Negotiation, Part II

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Negotiating Tactics of the Week

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